cops

Old-School Policing: Stories From the Days Before Body Cameras

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By Benjamin GroffMedia© | benandsteve.com | ©2025

3–5 minutes

Going Into Service

Police work operated on instinct, humor, and gritty common sense before body cameras. Every arrest didn’t turn into a viral upload back then. This approach belonged to another era. Officers learned from veterans who passed down unwritten rules — some practical, some questionable, and some downright hilarious. These stories aren’t a manual. They’re memories from a world that helped shape the officers we later became.

Don’s Lessons for Rookie Officers

Don was a seasoned officer whose wisdom mixed patience with a dry, knowing humor. He often told rookies about the prisoners who would scream for an entire transport ride. These are the same kind you see in fifteen-minute viral videos today.

He’d tell the infamous alum-powder story with a wink.

“Keep a plastic bag of it in your shirt pocket.

If you get a screamer, take a pinch and flick it – they will shut up!”

This always left rookies unsure whether he was pulling their leg. Or, was he sharing some relic from an era with fewer rules and more noise? His message was never about techniques. It was about the mindset: don’t let chaos set the tone. And always keep your humor intact.

The “Dog!” Brake Test

Another bit of old-school folklore involved the rowdy back-seat prisoner who wouldn’t stop cussing or kicking. Officers had a classic trick:

Get the patrol car up to about forty-five miles an hour.

Slam on the brakes.

Yell,

“Dog!”

The prisoner would slam into the cage divider and go silent. This silence would last until the second dog ran across the road. By the time they arrived at the jail, the only thing left in them was concern for the imaginary dogs.

It wasn’t policy. It wasn’t pretty. It was one of those stories officers shared over coffee. They shook their heads at “the way things used to be.”

The Gilligan’s Island Sobriety Test

DUI stops had their own brand of comedy. When you already knew the drunk driver was going to jail, the roadside field tests became… creative.

The “Gilligan’s Island Test” was a favorite:

Place your left hand over your head. Hold your right ear with your right hand. Balance on one foot. Sing the theme to Gilligan’s Island.

Most never made it past “a three-hour tour.”

It broke the tension. And after a long, cold night, sometimes everyone needed that.

Jurisdiction and the Art of Paperwork Avoidance

Jurisdiction lines used to shift like sand depending on who wanted — or didn’t want — the call. If the incident required endless paperwork, officers suddenly cared very deeply about city-limit boundaries, council-meeting notes, and outdated maps.

Veterans avoided calls they weren’t dispatched to, knowing the penalty: days off lost to court subpoenas. Midnight-shift officers often clocked out at dawn. They then sat in a courtroom until midafternoon. They did this while waiting for cases where they never said a word.

It was exhausting, but it was part of the rhythm of old-school policing.

A Time Before Cameras — And a Time With More Witnesses

These stories sound wild today, but much of policing back then was driven by common sense and community trust. People knew officers, and officers knew their people.

Citizens were often the first to speak up if an officer crossed a line. This happened long before social media or body cams existed. Even without technology, accountability came from individuals who believed in keeping standards high.

Most officers didn’t stop someone without a genuine reason. Those who abused that privilege rarely lasted. It was an unwritten rule — understood, enforced, and expected.

Closing Reflection

Old-school policing wasn’t perfect — not by a long shot. But it existed in a different world with different expectations. Humor softened harder edges. Community relationships carried more weight. And the job, for better or worse, relied on improvisation.

Today’s policing is built on transparency and technology, and that’s a good evolution. But these stories stay important. They are reminders of the human side of the badge, the long nights, and the strange solutions. These stories also recall the characters who trained us and the moments that shaped us along the way.

One persistent problem is untruths. Misinformation continues to mislead the public. These actions make the police look unfavorable.

Groff Media ©2025 benandsteve.com Truth Endures By: Benjamin Groff

About the Author:

Benjamin Groff is a former police officer and radio news anchor. He has hosted programs for CNN and ABC News affiliates in Colorado and Wyoming. His career in law enforcement began in 1980 and lasted more than two decades. This gave him firsthand insight into the criminal mind and public safety. Moreover, it provided him with an understanding of the human stories that often go untold. His writing draws on these experiences, blending street-level truth with a journalist’s eye for the bigger picture.

From the Plains to the Pavement: Agent Bill Johns’ Journey from the Wild West to Philadelphia’s Dark Alleys

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4–5 minutes

Bill Johns: The Bureau’s Man in the 1940s

It was the 1940s, and the Bureau had just transferred Bill Johns to the Philadelphia office. He arrived with a reputation built out west. The cases there were more challenging. The distances were longer, and the suspects were meaner. Officially, he was sent to cover Oklahoma, Texas, and New Mexico. Unofficially, he’d become “the best investigating chicken thief agent in the West.” His fellow agents gave him this nickname with a wink.

But Bill Johns had investigated far more than stolen hens. His most significant case had been in Osage County, Oklahoma: three Indian women, each murdered after marrying into money. For nearly three years, Johns chased a trail of false alibis, hidden bank accounts, and hired killers. He and another agent narrowly escaped ambushes five different times. By constantly dropping low and drawing faster than the men who wanted them dead.

Johns wasn’t flashy, but he had something rare—an intuition that couldn’t be taught. He would size up a suspect the way a rancher sizes up a horse. He knew when someone was lying about a bloodstain on a shirt. He knew this the same way he knew when a horse trader was covering up a limp. He followed the tiny clues that led from stolen goods to the back rooms where the real deals happened. He also traced a murder weapon to the man who’d hidden it.

What the Bureau didn’t understand—and still doesn’t—is that this ability isn’t in a handbook. It isn’t taught at the Academy. It’s a gift, as fragile as it is powerful. Use it or lose it. And only a few men like Johns ever had it.

In Philadelphia, this instinct would serve him just as well. He found himself involved with city syndicates. He encountered labor racketeering and noticed spies slipping through the docks at night. The same gut feeling had kept him alive in Osage County. Now it helped him spot the double-talkers in the bars. It also identified the men who lingered just a second too long at a back door.

Johns became known for something unusual—he rarely needed his gun. He’d walk into a situation, lean against a doorway, and just talk. By the time he left, the suspect had revealed more than he intended. John had already secured the evidence. He was no saint. He wasn’t perfect either. Nonetheless, he was a quiet professional in an era when crime was changing. The country was changing too.

The Last Case in Philadelphia

It was a rainy October night in 1947 when Johns’ instincts jolted him awake. An informant had whispered about a shipment coming into the Delaware River docks. This shipment was not whiskey or smuggled textiles. It was microfilm from Europe that would compromise national security. By dawn, he was leaning against a warehouse door. He pulled his collar up against the mist. He watched the shadows move across the slick cobblestones.

Later, back at the Bureau’s office, his supervisor shook his head. “How’d you know?” Johns simply shrugged. He never talked about instinct. He never mentioned gifts. He didn’t say how he’d been listening to his gut since his days chasing killers in Osage County. But he knew this: it wasn’t about being the fastest shot or the toughest agent. It was about reading people, seeing the truth they were trying to hide, and moving before they did.

When the men finally appeared, Johns didn’t draw his gun. Instead, he stepped into the light. Placing his hands in his overcoat pockets. He spoke in the calm, level tone that had unnerved more suspects than handcuffs ever would. One man slipped, trying to hide a satchel, and Johns pounced on him. In seconds, the microfilm was in his hand. The men, rattled and unsure how he’d seen through their plan, dropped their smokes and bolted.

That was Bill Johns’ legacy — an unassuming agent who became legendary not for force, but for foresight. His name rarely made headlines. Still, his quiet successes became the stories younger agents told each other. They shared these stories when they needed courage. Stories that remind you some people are born to find the truth, no matter where it hides.

Even today, his old case files are dusty, brittle, and overlooked. They still read like short stories of the American frontier meeting the modern city. Behind each one is the same simple truth. There’s no substitute for knowing people. No training can replace genuine instinct.

By Benjamin GroffMedia© | benandsteve.com | ©2025 

About the Author:

Benjamin Groff is a former police officer and radio news anchor. He has hosted programs for CNN and ABC News affiliates in Colorado and Wyoming. His career in law enforcement began in 1980 and lasted more than two decades. This gave him firsthand insight into the criminal mind and public safety. Moreover, it provided him with an understanding of the human stories that often go untold. His writing draws on these experiences, blending street-level truth with a journalist’s eye for the bigger picture.

Henry’s Midnight Firestorm A Cloud Of Dust And Mistrust

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2–3 minutes

Henry’s Midnight Firestorm

Henry had been laying low for months. He wasn’t exactly on the best terms with the brass at his small police department. He’d been on the midnight shift so long, most people in town barely remembered he worked there. To entertain himself, he left funny notes about the place signed “John Henry.” The detective division took six months to figure out who was behind the jokes. They learned the truth only by accident.

Henry confessed to one of the detectives during a neighborly beer session. The young detective was desperate for some action. He had gone a year without a single arrest. He thought maybe Henry can teach him a thing or two. Henry didn’t hold back: “For starters, I’m not sitting on my ass in the office for eight hours.” It stung. The detective had only one unit in his division. His wet-hen supervisor kept him glued to a desk. Henry, on the other hand, led the department in felony arrests for two years straight. His bluntness was legendary, especially among supervisors who loved to hate him.

But it was what happened at 3:00 a.m. one night that sealed Henry’s reputation. He pulled his black-and-white patrol unit up to the north entry door of the station. He wanted to check his oil. He also wanted to check his transmission fluid. Both were low. As he topped the transmission, some spilled onto the exhaust pipes and burst into flames. In seconds, the underside of the cruiser was lit up like a bonfire. Henry shouted, “Shit! Shit! Shit!” sprinted inside, grabbed the fire extinguisher, and went to work.

The flames went out. A massive cloud of extinguisher powder billowed everywhere—under the car, across the pavement, and straight into the police department itself. The breathalyzer, computers, and half the office equipment were dusted in a fine white film. To anyone walking in, it looked like a cocaine snowstorm had blown through the station.

Henry realized it would take 18 hours to clean, and he wasn’t about to spend his shift playing janitor. He called to a cat he saw over in a alley way. It came to him. He picked it up and threw it into the station. Then he rolled the extinguisher across the floor causing it to seem that it had knocked over. He dusted off his hands and thought: “Shit happens. Things happen. And I’ll be in the far south district when they find this mess.” shut and locked the door and headed south. And that is where he was at 0800. Day shift radioed saying they were 10-8. Henry replied, good I am Ten Dash Seven!

To this day, no one ever heard the story—until now. The Cat? No one ever mentioned it again!

By Benjamin GroffMedia© | benandsteve.com | 2025 

The Sonoran Desert’s Buck Milford- Chapter 1 -Hotter Than Hades – A Hot Day Fighting Beatle Crickets In Arizona

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Arizona State Trooper Buck Milford From Ajo Dispatched To One Of The Hottest Calls Of The Summer

By Benjamin GroffMedia© | benandsteve.com | 2025 Truth Endures©

3–4 minutes

A Hot Day Fighting Beagle Crickets In Arizona

It had been a hot day in the Arizona Desert. The sun had sizzled the sands in the Sonoran Desert for the last month. High temperatures reached over 115 degrees for each day during the past seven days. The weather forecast warned of night temperatures reaching 120°F or higher in the days ahead. Arizona State Trooper Wayne Milford had his 1968 Chevrolet Impala Patrol car parked outside Ajo. He had filled the fuel tank with fuel. An ice chest was filled with water. This was in case motorists or hikers needed rescue in the barren desert regions. Buck was known for his mishaps.

Trooper Milford was widely appreciated for his sense of humor. He would show community members safety tips during public meetings when he had spare time. He also attended public events during his off-duty time. He was respected by those even that received traffic tickets from and who had been arrested by the state trooper. Because he was known as a fair individual.

That summer was challenging. The extreme heat and the invasion of the Mexican beagle cricket placed the whole state under stress. Trooper Milford became essential because there would be more surprises than one could shake a stick at. And Buck had ton’s of sticks!

The Mexican beagle cricket wasn’t actually from Mexico. It didn’t bark like a beagle. Yet, it did hum the theme song to The Andy Griffith Show at exactly 2:15 a.m., every night, in unison. No one knew why. Some said it was a mating call. Others blamed radiation. Buck didn’t care. He kept a fly swatter in the glove box and an old harmonica to confuse them.

On this particular Thursday, Buck had just finished explaining the dangers of cooking bacon on your car hood. This activity was a popular desert pastime. He was speaking to a group of overheated tourists from Connecticut when his police radio crackled.

“Unit 12, we’ve got a report of a suspicious object at mile marker 88. The caller says it might be a UFO or possibly a very shiny porta-potty. Please respond.”

Buck took a sip from his melted water bottle, sighed, and muttered, 

“Well, that’s probably just Carl again.” 

Carl Sandlin is a local conspiracy theorist and professional yodeler. He had been filing UFO reports ever since a silver taco truck passed him on I-10 doing 95.

Still, the procedure was the procedure. Buck fired up the Impala. He turned on the siren, which sounded more like a kazoo than a siren thanks to a duct-tape repair. Then, he rumbled down the dusty road.

When he reached mile marker 88, he saw Carl. Carl was shirtless and shoeless. He was holding up what appeared to be a fishing net wrapped in aluminum foil.

“There it is, Buck!”

Carl shouted, pointing to a shimmering metal shape in the distance. 

“That thing’s been hovering over my taco stand for an hour. My queso is boiling itself!”

Buck squinted. The heatwaves shimmered, giving everything a wobbly, dreamlike quality.

“Carl… that’s a new solar-powered PortaCooler. The highway crew just installed it yesterday. It’s got a misting feature and Wi-Fi.”

Carl blinked. 

“You mean I can update my blog from out here now?”

“Yes, Carl.”

“Well, dang.”

Just then, a convoy of beagle crickets marched across the road in front of them, humming their nightly tune.

Buck and Carl watched in silence. 

Carl finally said,

“You reckon they take requests?”

Well! You Reckon? They Take Request? We’ll have to wait until tomorrow. We need to find out if Buck will have to drive across the Grand Canyon State. He might be swatting at those Mexican Beagle Crickets. Or will the state hook a sprayer up to his unit? Check back tomorrow for another very exciting story, from the Valley of The Sun, where this story is being written!

Inside the Attic: Capturing a Dangerous Fugitive

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By Benjamin GroffMedia© | benandsteve.com | 2025 Truth Endures©

2–3 minutes

Early in my law enforcement career, I rode with some of the best in the business. These included David “Booty” Ware, Bruce Poolaw, Junior Toehay, Don Gabbard, and Buttin Williams. All were Native American except for Gabbard, a character in his own right.


By the time I was 19, I had experienced more than most people do in a lifetime. I was just getting started.


One day, nearly every law enforcement officer in the county joined a search. They were looking for a man named Virgil Bass. He had a felony warrant and was considered dangerous. Virgil had vowed he wouldn’t go to jail without a fight. If anyone tried to arrest him, he’d either kill them or die trying.


We started early that morning, sweeping from one end of the county to another. By evening, we reached Virgil’s parents’ house on the county’s west side. We surrounded the place, each of us watching for any sign of an escape.


Bruce and I approached the door and stepped inside. His parents claimed they hadn’t seen him, but they kept glancing up at the ceiling.


Bruce, all 6’6″ of him, said firmly,

“We need to check everywhere.”


We made a show of slamming doors, stomping around, acting like we’d searched every corner. Then we got to the attic.


Bruce looked at me.

“You’re the only one who’ll fit up there. I’ll give you a boost.”


Before I knew it, my head was poking through the attic opening. It was pitch black. I called down,

“I need a flashlight!”


I was half-expecting a two-by-four to come crashing down on me—or worse. If Virgil was up there, he saw me silhouetted by the light from below.


Bruce handed me his flashlight. I pulled myself up until my arms were entirely inside the attic and swept the beam around. The attic was filled with fluffy pink insulation. One spot was different. A trail led from the opening to a lumpy insulation patch. About five feet away, the insulation looked disturbed.


I looked down at Bruce.

“I need a poker iron.”


I heard Bruce ask the family if they had one, and he handed it to me within seconds. I jabbed the iron into the lump, then thought better of it and started whacking the hell out of it.


Suddenly, there was yelling and cursing, and Virgil burst out of the insulation.


“Stop it! Stop it! I give up!”

he hollered.


I ordered him to follow me down, and once he was out, we cuffed him. We took him outside to Booty’s patrol car. Booty looked at the lump rising over Virgil’s eye. He asked,

“How’d that happen?”


I shrugged.

“He fell on a poker iron.”


The whole crew burst out laughing. After all, it’s easy to fall on a poker iron. This is especially true when hiding in an attic after threatening to die before going to jail.

Real-Life Drama: Officer Finds Missing Dialysis Patient

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GROFF MEDIA 2024© TRUTH ENDURES IMDBPRO

Presented by benandsteve.com By: Benjamin Groff II©s

4–6 minutes

The Missing Man Case 1986

It had been a relatively slow night. There were the usual calls—nothing out of the ordinary. A lady reported a prowler near her home in the North Division. Tim was assigned there for the night due to staffing shortages. Usually, he worked in the South Division, but tonight, he was covering unfamiliar ground. He had made several traffic stops—broken taillights, expired tags, and speeding violations—but nothing major.

Tim was known for his relentless patrol work, stopping burglaries in progress, nabbing car thieves, and making felony arrests. He led his department in felony arrests. But just after midnight, he got a call from dispatch that promised to be something different.

“Unit 852, report of a missing man. Dialysis patient. Suicidal. See the reporting party at 515 North Main Street.”

515 North Main was in the oldest part of town. The houses date back to when the city was just a settlement. It wasn’t a known trouble location—not one of the repeat offenders officers constantly got sent to.

As Tim pulled up, he saw a porch light glowing. The house was a white A-frame with an overhang, modest but well-kept. Before he knocked, the door swung open. Inside, several people stood around, dressed as if they were about to go out for the evening.

Tim identified himself.

“Hello, I’m Officer Roff. I understand someone is missing?”

A woman stepped ahead. 

“I’m Kathy Gifford. Yes, my husband is missing. I don’t know how, but he’s gone!”

Tim raised an eyebrow.

“You don’t know how?”

Mrs. Gifford wrung her hands. 

“He’s skin and bones. He can barely walk. He’s on dialysis, and he probably doesn’t have long to live.” 

She took a deep breath. 

“He didn’t want me to go dancing with my friends tonight. He begged me to stay. He said it would be the last time I saw him if I walked out that door. But I thought he was just being dramatic.”

Tim had been a cop long enough to know that people sometimes exaggerated. He took her words with caution. 

“Did you search the house?”

Everyone nodded. 

“We did. He is not here.”

“What’s his name?”

“James Gifford, but he goes by Jimmy.”

Tim instructed everyone to stay put as he searched the house. He checked every room, corner, under sheets, and inside closets, calling out Jimmy’s name at every turn.

Ten minutes into the search, he entered the couple’s bedroom.

Mrs. Gifford sighed. 

“There’s no use looking in here. I’ve already searched everywhere.”

Tim wasn’t about to take her word for it.

“I have to be thorough before filing a missing persons report.”

He called out again. 

“Jimmy, this is Officer Roff with the Police Department. If you’re in here, tell me now! I’m about to search your room, and anything unlawful I find will result in criminal charges.”

Silence. Then, whispers from the people behind him.

Tim checked under the bed. Nothing was there. He turned to scan the room when Mrs. Gifford suddenly gasped.

“Oh my God, he has the gun!”

Tim spun around. 

“A gun? Don’t you think that’s something you should’ve mentioned earlier?”

His hand instinctively went to his sidearm, unsnapping the holster. He stepped to the closet door and pulled it open. It was dark inside. He clicked on his flashlight and swept the beam across the space. Nothing. Then, near the front of the closet, he saw a pile of laundry.

Beneath it, Jimmy lay motionless, staring straight up at the ceiling. A .25 Automatic rested on his bony chest.

Tim’s breath caught. 

“Jesus!” 

His outburst sent the people behind him scattering, running out of the house.

His training took over. Tim drew his weapon and leveled it at Jimmy.

 “Don’t move! Don’t reach for the gun!”

But Jimmy never flinched. He just looked up at Tim, his expression empty.

Tim quickly reached down, grabbed the pistol off Jimmy’s chest, and took a step back. 

“Get up. Get out of the closet.”

Jimmy slowly sat up, his frail body trembling.

Tim exhaled, his adrenaline still surging. 

“What the hell was this all about?”

Jimmy sighed. 

“I just wanted to scare her. Make her feel bad for leaving me. Make her think twice next time. That’s all.”

Tim shook his head. 

“You know, there are better ways to ask for attention.”

Jimmy just looked at him, defeated.

Tim crossed his arms. 

“Look, you have two choices. Either you voluntarily go to a mental health unit tonight, or you surrender this gun until Monday.”

Jimmy hesitated.

Tim pressed on. 

“You can come pick it up at the police department after you cool down. But I’m not walking out of here knowing I am back in two hours for a murder-suicide.”

After a long pause, Jimmy sighed. 

“Fine. Take the gun.”

Tim secured the weapon and turned back toward the doorway, where Mrs. Gifford and her friends had cautiously gathered again. He shook his head and muttered, 

“This is the Ruby Don’t Take Your Love to Town call to beat all others.”

One of the men raised an eyebrow. 

“What?”

Tim smirked. 

“You know, the song. The guy’s disabled, and his woman goes out dancing anyway. I never thought I’d see it play out in real life.”

The room fell silent.

Tim exhaled, holstered his weapon, and radioed in. 

“Unit 852, situation under control. Subject located. No further assistance needed.”

As he walked out, he couldn’t help but shake his head. 

“Damn country songs. They’re always right.”

The Mayor Who Helped Kill Women

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GROFF MEDIA 2024© TRUTH ENDURES IMDBPRO

Presented by benandsteve.com By: Benjamin Groff II©s

6–8 minutes

Jethro’s patrol car rounded the corner in the middle of the night. He had been around the block once before. His patrol practices always involved retracing where he had been. Burglars would often wait for a police car to pass and then start their craft. This practice by Jethro helped him lead the department in felony arrests for two years. 

Half-dressed a week earlier, he had come across the Town’s Mayor. The Mayor, Tim Awning, was running across the front lawn of a residence. Jethro had to calm him down. He then heard a story that the Mayor had been a victim of a holdup. Reportedly, a group of thugs had taken his car. The Mayor’s story was in bits and disoriented. Oddly, Mayor Awning said he only wanted to go home. He didn’t want to file a report. 

While driving the Mayor to his home, they came upon his car less than a block away, and Mayor Awning said –

“Stop here; I have an extra set of keys; I will drive it home myself.”

Jethro thought it odd that the Mayor didn’t want to file a report. Even more suspicious, the Mayor insisted that looking inside was useless. He said whatever the hooligans may have done was not an issue. Mayor Awning went even further, insisting Officer Jethro not look into his vehicle. The Mayor claimed his right to privacy through search and seizure rights. 

Now, Jethro was patrolling the same area. He cruised slowly. His patrol car’s lights were turned off, and the windows were rolled down so he hear. Near where Jethro had come upon the Mayor a week earlier, he went to a near stop. The hair on his neck started to rise; his sixth instinct was telling him something, but what? He crept his patrol unit further when he heard a lady screaming. He stopped and tried to find where the screams were coming from.

He looked over his right shoulder. He saw a lady in night clothes running across the front lawn of a home. The same home he had come across the Mayor. He radioed his headquarters his location and told the operator he was out with a distressed resident. The operator sent an extra unit as a precautionary measure. As Jethro exited his unit, he turned on his overhead red and blues, and the lady ran to him screaming –––

“Officer, it isn’t good. I can’t believe it. I just got home and changed for the night. I went in to say goodnight to my roommates. They are all dead. Blood is everywhere!”

Officer Jethro wasn’t sure what to make of the hysterics. But he asked her to catch her breath. And told her another unit was responding. Understanding that whatever she sees is in the house was dramatic he told her they are safe outside. He made sure she had a seat in his unit. Then, he waited for the backup officer to go into the home to see what she had reported. 

The backup arrived. Her name was Officer Jilly. Jethro and she worked together in the South Division for over a year. As they entered the home with their weapons drawn, they went from room to room, securing it. Finally, in the back of the house, they came to the bedroom where the carnage was found. Three women were found slashed to death.

Jethro’s gut twisted at the sight before him. Blood filled the room with a metallic stench. The dim light from the bedside lamp cast eerie shadows over the bodies. The women sprawled across the bed and floor, their nightclothes soaked in deep crimson. Jilly covered her mouth, swallowing the bile rising in her throat.

Jethro took a deep breath and turned to Jilly. 

“Call it in. We need the homicide unit and CSU here now.”

Jilly nodded and stepped into the hallway to radio for assistance. Jethro scanned the room, taking in every detail. There were no signs of forced entry. The door had been unlocked, and there was no shattered glass or overturned furniture. This wasn’t a robbery gone wrong. This was something else—something far more sinister.

Then, he noticed it: A single business card on the nightstand, smeared with blood. He pulled out a glove from his belt, careful not to contaminate any evidence, and picked it up. 

The card read:

Timothy Awning – Mayor

Jethro’s jaw tightened. His mind flashed back to the Mayor’s bizarre behavior a week earlier. He remembered the frantic running across the lawn. There was also the refusal to report the car theft. The Mayor insisted that Jethro does not look inside.

Jethro was a thorough officer. He made notes of everything, time-stamped his reports, and carried a voice-activated tape recorder in his patrol unit. Anything said inside the vehicle was considered public, and Officer Jethro had recorded the entire meeting with Mayor Awning. Now, he had a reason to review it.

“Jilly!” 

He called.

She reentered the room, her face pale. 

“What is it?”

Jethro held up the card. 

“We need to talk to the Mayor. Now.”

——

Mayor Tim Awning sat in his lavish den when Jethro and Jilly arrived. He held a tumbler of whiskey in his hand. 

His eyes flicked toward them, momentarily startled, before he forced a grin.

“Well, Officers, this is a surprise,” he said, shifting in his chair. “What brings you to my home at this hour?”

Jethro stepped ahead, tossing the bloodied business card onto the coffee table. 

“We just left a crime scene. Three women were murdered in the same house where we found you last week.”

Awning’s face paled, but he quickly regained his composure. 

“That’s—terrible. But I don’t see what that has to do with me.”

Jilly folded her arms. 

“Your business card was found at the scene.”

Awning scoffed. 

“I’ve given out thousands of those over the years. That proves nothing.”

Jethro leaned in.

“Your behavior last week was unusual. You were running half-dressed across the lawn. You claimed your car was stolen but refused to file a report. What happened that night, Mayor?”

Awning’s grip on the tumbler tightened. 

“I told you what happened.”

Jethro’s voice dropped. 

“No, you told me a story. But the real story is that you were at that house that night. You saw or did something that made you run. And I think whatever happened, it’s connected to what we found tonight.”

Awning’s jaw clenched. Beads of sweat formed at the Mayor Awning’s temples. Jilly took a step closer. 

“Where were you tonight, Mayor?”

Awning exhaled sharply and downed the rest of his whiskey. He set the glass down with a sharp clink. 

“At home. Alone.”

Jethro exchanged a glance with Jilly. They had him.

——

The crime scene investigators recovered more evidence. Fibers from the Mayor’s vehicle matched traces found in the victims’ home. Security footage showed his car in the vicinity the night of the murders. And then there was the most damning piece of evidence—blood found in the trunk of his car.

Faced with overwhelming proof, Mayor Awning finally broke. He confessed that he had been involved in a secret arrangement with influential figures in town. The house was where illegal dealings occurred—deals that had gone wrong. That night a week ago, he had seen a gruesome execution. He panicked and fled, leaving behind his car. The killers, nonetheless, had unfinished business.

By the time Jethro and Jilly had put the pieces together, it was too late for the three women. But it wasn’t too late for justice.

Tim Awning was arrested, and his political career ended in disgrace. As he got led out of his mansion in handcuffs, the weight of his crimes hung heavy in the air. Jethro knew this case would haunt him. Nonetheless, at least now, the Mayor would finally pay for his sins. This Mayor had helped kill women.

The Last to Fall

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Presented by benandsteve.com By: Benjamin Groff II©

3–5 minutes

The stories of “The Magnificent Seven” were told with reverence in the small, aging town of Canadian. It nestles in the shadow of a mountain range near the Comanche Indian Reservations. They were not just police officers. They were beacons of bravery. Each one was a sentinel of justice. They had shaped the history of law enforcement in the area. Their tales of courage, integrity, and unyielding commitment to the badge echoed in the walls of the old precinct. Black-and-white photos of the seven adorned the main hallway.

Now, only one of them remained.

Thomas “Tommy” Wade was the last to fall. At 82, he still carried himself with the dignity that had defined his career. Time had dulled the sharpness of his features. Nonetheless, his piercing blue eyes—eyes that had stared down criminals and shielded victims—had not lost their fire. Tommy had outlived his brothers-in-arms. It was not because he was the strongest or the fastest. It was because, as he often quipped, –––

“I was just lucky.”

Yet, his legacy, his unwavering commitment to service, and his enduring impact on the community, was far from luck.

It was more than luck, though. Tommy had survived gunfights, ambushes, and even a close call with a car bomb planted by a vengeful felon. But his survival wasn’t the story. The story was about how he and his six comrades had redefined serving and protecting.

The Legends

Each member of the Magnificent Seven had a chapter in the book of Canadian history.

  • James “Big Jim” Hawthorne was the largest and strongest of the group. He was known for breaking up a bar brawl single-handedly. He tossed men around like rag dolls without ever drawing his weapon. He always said –––
    • “Strength is knowing when not to use it.”
  • Eddie Diaz, the marksman, had ended a three-day hostage standoff with a single, precise shot that saved a child’s life. He was quiet and almost shy, but his calm precision made him a hero when danger arose.
  • “Doc” Peterson, the team medic, was a genius at keeping people alive in harrowing circumstances. A former Army medic, he carried his battlefield skills into the streets of Canadian.

Walter “Walt” Grayson, the thinker, used his sharp intellect to outwit criminal masterminds. He often ended conflicts before they began by anticipating a felon’s next move.

Frankie “Spitfire” McNeil, the youngest, was impulsive but had a heart as big as the town. He chased down burglars on foot and once shielded a family from gunfire with his own body.

Samuel “Sam” Colton, the leader, brought them all together. Sam’s vision for law enforcement was rooted in community service and compassion. He was a mentor, a father figure, and a friend.

And then there was Tommy Wade, the glue that held them together. He was the everyman who listened, mediated disputes, and ensured the team had each other’s backs.

A Legacy Remembered

On the day of Tommy’s memorial, the whole town gathered. The mayor spoke, recounting the officers’ countless acts of heroism. Citizens shared personal stories. They spoke of how one of the Seven had saved their lives. Others talked about how the Seven brought justice to their families.

But Tommy’s granddaughter, Emily, delivered the most poignant eulogy. She stood before the crowd, holding the silver badge her grandfather had carried for over thirty years.

“My grandfather used to tell me stories of these men,”

she began, her voice trembling.

“He told me that each carried a burden—of duty, danger, and sacrifice. They didn’t wear capes or fly through the air. They walked the streets, often alone, and faced fear head-on so the rest of us didn’t have to.”

Emily paused, holding the badge close to her chest.

“He also told me that they weren’t perfect. They made mistakes and carried regrets. But what set them apart was their unwavering moral compass. They believed in justice, fairness, and the value of every life.”

As the crowd listened, she added,

“They were the best of us. My grandfather was the last to fall. He always said it wasn’t about the badge or the recognition. It was about the people they served.”

The Eternal Flame

A statue now stands in the Canadian central park: seven figures, shoulder to shoulder, their badges gleaming in the sunlight. Inscribed at the base are the words: “To serve and protect—the legacy lives on.”

The Magnificent Seven are gone, but their stories endure. These tales are whispered in classrooms and retold at family dinners. They are honored in the lives of the officers who came after them. Tommy Wade have been the last to fall, but the spirit of his team will never fade.

When You Fight For your Life Any Thing Is Fair! Lt Wheeler’s Advice Of A Lifetime

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Presented by benandsteve.com By: Benjamin Groff II©

3–5 minutes
Officer Steve Mahan
Shot and Killed Jan 5. 1983

As I prepared for work, the memory of Officer Steve Mahan lingered heavily in my thoughts. He had been shot and killed on January 5th, 1983—a day etched in tragedy. That morning, a dense, unrelenting fog blanketed the world as if nature itself mourned the impending loss. I recalled how the rescue helicopter, grounded by the impenetrable fog, couldn’t transport him to a larger hospital equipped to treat his severe head trauma. Desperate, the doctors had no choice but to send him by ambulance over 100 miles away.


The ambulance crawled through the soupy mist, often unable to exceed 30 miles per hour. Time was slipping away, and the slow, arduous journey became a race against death. Despite their best efforts, he passed en route, his life extinguished before the fog could lift.


That day haunted me. As I pulled on my uniform, I reminded myself that tonight, I would be assigned to the very unit he had been using on the night he was executed. A weight settled on my shoulders—not fear but a solemn understanding of the risks we all faced. Yet, I felt a measure of reassurance knowing that Lt. Wheeler would be by my side, his steady guidance serving as both a compass and a shield against the uncertainty of the streets.

On my first day of patrol, the challenges of the job revealed themselves immediately, with a fatality marking my inaugural call. It was a sobering introduction to the weight of my duty. My Lieutenant, a seasoned mentor, shared his wisdom throughout the shift as we navigated the Oklahoma Statutes, Title 21. He precisely explained how every crime must meet specific legal criteria before being classified as such and emphasized the foundational principle that every suspect is presumed innocent until proven guilty. That early understanding of the law, I realized, was not just knowledge—it was a tool for justice and fairness, critical to our line of work.

The second day began differently. I was well-rested but curious about what this shift could bring. What could top the tragic death of the older woman the day before? The night unfolded quietly at first. My Lieutenant and I were patrolling the city’s southern section, with him now shifting the conversation to Title 47 of the Oklahoma Statutes, covering traffic laws and their nuances.

Then, without warning, the calm was shattered. The Lieutenant slammed our unit’s transmission into park and leapt out, his movements fluid and precise. Before I could react, he bolted to my side of the vehicle and tackled a man gripping his wife by the hair on the sidewalk. It had all happened instantly—I hadn’t even registered the altercation out of the corner of my eye. When I opened my door, Lieutenant Wheeler was already cuffing the suspect with practiced efficiency.

I stood momentarily frozen, feeling like I had failed to pull my weight. The Lieutenant’s decisive action was a masterclass in vigilance, and I resolved to sharpen my instincts.

After ensuring the woman was safe and gathering her statement, we booked the man into jail on charges of public intoxication, disorderly conduct, and assault and battery. The routine of patrol resumed, but the night had already taken on a different tone. During this lull, Lieutenant Wheeler imparted what I’ve come to regard as the most crucial lesson of my career.

“When you fight for your life, anything is fair,”

He said with a gravity that lingered in the air.

“Out there, there are no rules.”

He also stressed the importance of situational awareness and knowing the city like the back of my hand. While my previous experience in communications had given me a solid understanding of the city from a dispatcher’s perspective, patrolling the streets was entirely different.

He taught me to read the moving pieces of the urban puzzle—to develop a comprehensive view that encompassed the road ahead and the vast expanses on either side. Under his guidance, my observational skills sharpened, leading to accomplishments such as preventing a potential robbery and aiding in a successful arrest, which I could later be proud of.

It felt like I’d absorbed a semester’s criminal justice training in just two nights. But nothing could have prepared me for what was to come on the third night. Neither of us could have anticipated the events that would unfold, including a high-speed escort and a tense high profile traffic stop and truthfully, neither of us would have chosen to.

What happened next would change everything. Yet, in the end, it would pass unnoticed by the world—a fleeting moment in the grand scheme of our duty. This moment, however, was a stark reminder of the unpredictable nature of our work and the need for constant vigilance and resilience. That is the story which unfolded for day three.

Saying Goodbye to The Old Station – And Hello to A New Destination 16

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Presented by benandsteve.com By: Benjamin Groff II

The days felt strange for those of us who worked nights. As the darkness stretched on, one night blending into the next, daylight seemed more a memory than reality. Law enforcement is more than just a job; it’s a close-knit community, a world. There’s a deep-rooted fellowship among officers and an unbreakable chain of command that’s everything. Yet, that structure was sometimes a challenge for me to accept.

In a large family—four older brothers, two older sisters, a strict father, and a devoted mother—order was part of life. In a rural setting, the school was the only place outside the home where I experienced a different structure. Dad was the highest authority in our household, followed by Mom, then the eldest sibling present, down to the youngest. Dad’s words held firm even in his absence; his authority was an invisible force that needed no reinforcement.

Adjusting to the chain of command in law enforcement took me time, especially after starting in small departments with more relaxed structures. But at Elk City Police Department, things were different. There was a formal hierarchy: chief, assistant chief, major, captain, lieutenant, sergeant, patrolman, and communications officer. Here, I quickly learned that approaching the chief directly with questions or concerns was a breach of protocol, often met with a firm reminder to follow the ranks.

Simple tasks became lessons in patience. Whether I needed a lightbulb replaced or advice on a report, the chain of command required me to go through several levels before reaching a solution; I would have to wait days to get a minor answer. Frustrated, I eventually bit my lip and followed the structure, even if I didn’t like it. My captain called me out over the most minor lapses, like failing to change a burnt lightbulb on time, and I’d swallow my frustration, understanding that order was paramount.

As the community passed a tax to fund a new police station, we began to outgrow the quirks of our aging headquarters at 303 West Fifth Street. The old building, despite its shortcomings, was more than just a structure. It was a part of us, a place where we shared stories, laughed, and supported each other. Built in the 1930s, it had weathered time and neglect. Prisoners on the second floor could flood toilets, causing wastewater to seep into the dispatch and booking area below. But it was our home, filled with memories and camaraderie.

The new station was completed in 1984. Moving was bittersweet, not just for the community, who’d grown used to stopping by the old station for a friendly chat, but for us, too. The new facility was a symbol of progress, outfitted with state-of-the-art security, bulletproof glass, and advanced communication systems. The dispatch had better lighting, new mirrors, and high-tech computers; the National Law Enforcement Telecommunications System and National Crime Information Center computers were side-by-side. Every call was recorded and could be retrieved at any moment.

The jail had electronically controlled gates, holding cells, a kitchen, and a secure emergency exit. Security cameras covered the entire facility, displaying activity on monitors in the booking area. There were dedicated offices for records, evidence, detectives, and the command staff. In every way, it was an upgrade.

On the day of the move, I was instructed by ‘Captain Bick’ to stay home and prepare for the night shift. Despite my eagerness to be part of the transition, I respected his orders. Later that evening, I found myself driving to the old station out of habit. As I parked and entered, I was struck by the emptiness of the dispatch office. This was where I had sent officers out, received urgent calls, and coordinated responses. Now, it was a mere shell of its former self. Assistant Fire Chief Bob, who was also present, chuckled, ‘You’re at the wrong place—no cops here anymore!’

I smiled, feeling a wave of nostalgia, and pointed to the old wall that separated our side from the fire department. ‘Did you know President Carter’s original ‘Beast’ limousine was parked right on the other side of that wall one night? All the fire trucks were cleared out, and our officers watched to ensure no one touched it.’

Bob laughed, “Yeah, I remember that night. I was here too.”

It was hard to let go of stories like that—stories that had lifted people’s spirits and given them a break from their own troubles. With a sigh, I left the old building, heading to the new station, marveling at the thought of a facility so high-tech that even the door lock had a security code… which someone had promptly taped over because officers kept forgetting it.

After settling in, I was tasked with a significant assignment: entering city burglary data into the new computer system. I approached this task with the same dedication I gave every task, and it quickly provided me with valuable insights into the patterns of theft in the city. Over the next two years, this groundwork would prove instrumental in helping us dismantle a significant theft ring. But that’s a story for another time—this one is about the journey to a new place and the adjustments, big and small, that shaped us along the way.

NightShift In The South District

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A Story By: Benjamin Groff© Groff Media 2024© Truth Endures

The city’s skyline, dotted with the faint glow of distant lights, stretched like a jagged silhouette against the darkening sky. As the clock struck 8 p.m., the streets of the south district began to stir with a life all their own. The south district was notorious, where the line between night and day blurred into a constant shade of grey, and danger was not just a possibility but an expectation.

Officer Jacob Reed adjusted his vest and checked his gear before leaving the station. According to the seasoned officers, it was his first solo night shift in the south district, a baptism by fire. He had heard the stories—the gang disputes, the addicts, the desperate, the damned. But nothing could truly prepare him for the reality of patrolling these mean streets.

The radio crackled to life as he started his patrol car, the familiar voice of the dispatcher cutting through the static. “Unit 27, disturbance reported on 5th and Elm. Suspected domestic violence. Proceed with caution.”

Jacob felt a knot tighten in his stomach. Domestic calls were unpredictable and often turned violent. He sped through the streets, the red and blue lights flashing against the crumbling buildings and graffiti-stained walls.

As he arrived, he could already hear the shouting. A man and a woman, voices thick with anger and pain, spilling out from a run-down apartment. Jacob approached cautiously, hand on his holster. The door was ajar, the argument escalating. He knocked loudly, announcing his presence, which momentarily stunned the couple into silence.

The woman, tears streaking her face, pushed past him and ran into the night, leaving Jacob alone with the man—a towering figure, eyes wild with rage and something darker. “You got no business here, cop,” the man snarled.

Jacob knew better than to engage in a back-and-forth. “Sir, I need you to calm down. Let’s talk this out. No one needs to get hurt tonight.”

But the man was beyond reason. He lunged at Jacob, who barely had time to react, wrestling him to the floor. The training kicked in, and within moments, Jacob had the man subdued and in handcuffs. But the adrenaline still pumped through his veins as he led the man to the patrol car, the woman’s disappearance lingering in his mind. It was just the beginning of the night.

The hours they dragged on, each call blurring into the next—a bar fight that ended with broken bottles and blood, a missing child who had been found in an alley shivering and alone, a burglary in progress that turned into a chase through the maze of backstreets.

The south district had a pulse of its own, a relentless, pounding rhythm that seemed to sync with the beat of Jacob’s heart. He could feel the weight of the night pressing down on him, the darkness closing in from all sides. There were moments when the fear gnawed at him, but he pushed it down, focused on the next call, the next crisis.

Around 3 a.m., as the city reached its most sinister hour, Jacob found himself at a crossroads, literally and figuratively. He got flagged down by a frantic woman claiming someone shot her boyfriend. She led him to a dilapidated building where the faint scent of gunpowder still hung in the air. Inside, the scene was grim—a young man, barely older than Jacob, lay bleeding out on the floor.

Jacob radioed for an ambulance and knelt beside the man, trying to stop the bleeding, but the wounds were too severe. The man’s eyes, filled with pain and fear, met Jacob’s. “I didn’t mean to… I didn’t mean…” he rasped before the light in his eyes faded.

Jacob sat back, his hands stained with blood, his heart heavy. The ambulance arrived too late, and as they wheeled the body away, Jacob felt a hollowness settle in. The streets had claimed another life, and despite his best efforts, he was powerless to stop it.

The night continued its brutal march towards dawn, with Jacob responding to calls that tested his resolve—an overdose that ended with a life saved, a car accident where luck favored the victim, and a confrontation with a knife-wielding suspect that left him shaken but unharmed.

As the first light of dawn broke over the horizon, Jacob finally pulled back into the station, exhausted and drained. The south district was a battleground, and the scars it left were not always visible. He had survived the night, but he knew there would be many more like it, each with its dangers, each demanding more from him than he thought he had to give.

But as he hung up his gear and prepared to go home, he knew he would return the next night. Because despite the fear, despite the darkness, there was a part of him that knew he was needed here, in these mean streets, where the line between good and evil was as blurred as the city skyline at dusk

The Comm Commander’s Typical Night In Communications At The Police Department

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A Story By Benjamin H Groff© Groff Media Copyright 2024©

The Comm Commander had been very busy at 2 AM. After telling the girls his war stories from his previous assignment at a different department, his shift became busy booking prisoners. Officers began bringing in subjects they arrested for Driving Under The Influence and Public Intoxication following the closing of several nightclubs and bars in the city.

As prisoners piled up in the booking area, one of the girls who had stayed over from an earlier shift moved the booking typewriter over on the book-in counter to open a ledger to log in prisoners’ names. As she was moving the typewriter, a prisoner became offensive and began fighting with the police officers, and two officers had to lift and plant his body down on the counter to get control of him. As they were putting handcuffs back on the man, the officer’s physical strength caused the man’s head to face plant into the typewriter.

The Comm Commander continued to ask book-in questions ––

“do you have any health concerns we should know about?

Prisoner ––––

“I probably do now, with my head in this machine!”

Comm Commander –––

“I will note that you have a typewriter about your head when booking.”

The night was busy until dawn, and there were still officers bringing prisoners in as the day shift began to arrive to start their duties.

As the light of day became brighter, a call came into Communications about a severe auto accident on Interstate 40 east of the city near an overpass involving several vehicles. Dispatch responded to a fire department rescue, fire truck, two ambulances, and two police units. The Comm Commander contacted the Oklahoma Highway Patrol on a point-to-point frequency, requesting they send a state trooper; the first arriving police unit reported back that there were two confirmed fatalities in a burning vehicle. The accident was in Washita County. The Comm Commander notified the Washita County Sheriff’s Office in Cordell, Oklahoma, to send a coroner, and they advised they also had a deputy en route. Such accidents were common in the area, and the department regularly responded to them as a mutual aid agreement with area jurisdictions.

These activities were shared during a night for the Comm Commander during his shift in Communications.

The Comm Commander Tells About Jailing His First Arrest

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A Story By Benjamin H Groff© Groff Media Copyright 2024©

It was slightly after 2 AM, and the calls had slowed to officers making traffic stops. They were watching for drunk drivers. The local bars closed then, and the streets would fill with drivers hitting light posts and speed signs.


Keeping track of their locations was a breeze, and the Comm Commander kept a log with details, including every detail radioed over the airwaves. The gals had been egging the Comm Commander to tell them one of his stories about his time at the other departments he had worked at. With a lull in activity, he thought, well, now is as good a time as any.

Edna and Gail had stayed over from their earlier shifts for the occasion. They were both much older than the Comm Commander, and he liked to tease them whenever he could pull a good trick on them. They, in turn, returned the favor. Edna, a divorcee, was snappy and wise. Gail was from the deep South and had a twang in her voice. Plus, she talked of her roots and Alabama every chance she got.

Well, ladies, the Comm Commander began,
“my first arrest was when I was barely 17. I arrested a man known as 15,000. The nickname 15,000 had been given him for the many times he had been arrested for public intoxication. Anyway, he walked into the police department and nearly fell over the dispatch desk. I told him he was going to the tank, and he thanked me. Then he tried to resist arrest when I got the door to the drunk tank open. I got him in there, and he went to sleep. A few days later, after seeing the judge, he was sentenced to two weeks in jail. I was checking on him, and he was having D.T.’s Delirium Tremens”

“Yes, we know what they are Comm Comm.” The ladies interrupted.

The Communications Commander continued,

“Well, I told our Chief JR Toehay, and he said give him a cup of liquor. So, I went to the evidence vault and found the alcohol bottle with the lowest proof that wasn’t evidence for court. I poured a shot into a cup and went to his cell. I opened the door and said hey Wallace, I have a drink for you. He lapped it up. Within a few minutes, he settled down. Over a week, I did that until he was clean, and when he left jail, he was sober. He stayed sober for the first time in years; he had never taken another drink, and he would come by the police department and thank me every night when I was working. He would thank me for being kind to him and helping him. That was when I thought I had finally reached someone doing this job.”

The next guy I arrested came into the police department like that; I had to fight and call for help. He started throwing things over the counter at me and going wild. When we got him into the cell, the Chief told me he was the suspect believed to have beaten a man to death behind the jail not long before I went to work for the department. There wasn’t enough evidence to support an arrest, and he would never have admitted to doing it. I asked if anyone had ever asked him when he was drunk and got told anything he admitted to being intoxicated wouldn’t hold up as a confession. The girl’s eyes were wide and expecting something more, so I said the biggest thing that happened was when the Chief and I helped in a kidnapping.

WHAT? The two ladies both said?

The Comm Commander explained it was under pretenses that a judge got brought to the jail. Five people with Federal Identifiers and Bureau of Indian Affairs Police Badges brought a lady to the town’s jail; the jail was contracted with the BIA as a facility for their agency. They provided legal paperwork authorizing the detention of a lady they had in custody as a material witness. She was to have no visitor, and no one was to know she was in our protective custody. The police department secured her in a female cell with the paperwork signed and sealed by a judge. She did not talk to anyone at the police department.

Two days later, while the Communications Commander was working, he happened to read in the paper that unknown people had kidnapped a federal judge from the Commanche Indian Tribal Headquarters. It also showed the picture of the lady we had in custody. He went to the Chief and told him to show him the newspaper article. The Chief said several colorful words and then called the city attorney. The Chief and Comm Comm, went to the cell, removed the lady, and told her they believed they knew who she was and that she was safe. They also said she could make a phone call and encouraged her to call anyone she thought she could trust. She could stay with the police department and only leave once she knew who she was going with could be trusted. Eventually, the Oklahoma Highway Patrol and a Federal Bureau of Investigation Agent arrived. The Communications Commander explained he stayed by the radio. And said he knew she left with a massive group of people around her, which shows how easy it can be for someone to be falsely locked up in a small town.

The ladies said –– “all this happened in that small town where you came from?”

The Comm Commander said ––

“oh, there was much more that happened while I was there. These are just a few of the things that happened at the jail. We did so much more out on the street. I will have to save for another time because I have three units bringing in prisoners, and I have to go to book them!”